Pure Again: The Path to Reclaiming Purity after Past Failures

In a world where the tide of over-sexualization rises daily, it’s not a question of ‘if’ but ‘when’ we or someone close to us will stumble. This stark reality hits even harder for those raising the next generation as the specter of sexual sin looms large over our young teens. We face a provocative truth: in a culture that blurs lines and pushes boundaries, maintaining purity feels like swimming against a relentless current.

Yet, here we stand, not resigned to defeat but ready to reclaim what’s been lost or threatened. We need to build a life of purity. Some of us, still shamed by a failure to do so, need to rebuild from the ruin. “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality” (1 Thess. 4:3). Here are a few steps designed for anyone ready to reset their course toward purity.

Prioritize Scripture

It’s tempting to turn to various resources for guidance in the aftermath of a fall. While books on purity offer insights, they cannot substitute the transformative power of God’s Word. It is living and active (Heb. 4:12) and capable of renewing minds and hearts (Rom. 12:2) because it revives the soul (Ps. 19:7). When we immerse ourselves in Scripture, we expose ourselves to the power of God. Then, true change can happen.

Accept Forgiveness

One of the hardest things for us to do is accept the forgiveness of God. We have a million reasons why we don’t, but none of them, nor all of them together, stack up to the grace of God. He promises that “if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleans us from all unrighteousness” (1 Jn. 1:9). You might need to remind yourself of this promise. Then, you might need to remind yourself again. It is hard to rebuild pure affection without embracing God’s grace. Accept God’s forgiveness. Don’t hold on to condemnation. It is a weight too heavy to hold.

Endure Consequences

While God’s forgiveness is immediate and complete, the earthly consequences of our actions linger. Enduring these consequences with grace and humility can be a powerful testimony to God’s refining work. After his sin with Bathsheba, King David endured the consequences. His story reminds us that even when forgiven, we may face repercussions (2 Sam 12:10-14). Yet, God’s mercy and purposes are still at work, molding us into the likeness of Christ. Endure the consequences and let them fuel your desire to rebuild purity.

Fight Condemnation

The enemy is adept at using our failures to sow seeds of condemnation, but Scripture offers a defense against these attacks. Remember, “there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Rom. 8:1). This truth helps us distinguish between godly conviction, which leads to repentance, and condemnation, which leads to despair. Clinging to this truth is crucial in resisting the enemy’s lies and moving forward in freedom. God is not condemning you. So, you can fight against it.

Restart Purity

You cannot change the past, but the future holds a canvas of possibilities for a life dedicated to purity. True repentance involves not just turning away from sin but embracing a steadfast resolve to never tread that path again. Draw a line in the sand. Put a stake in the ground. Decide today that you will wage war on impurity with all the might you can muster and all the grace you can depend on. “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God” (Col. 3:2-3). When you think on heavenly things, transformation follows.

Fellowship Together

Avoiding interactions with the opposite sex is neither feasible nor beneficial. Scripture instead guides us towards fostering healthy, godly connections. Within the church’s embrace, both men and women are urged to interact with the pure-hearted respect of each other (1 Timothy 5:1-2). These bonds are instrumental in our spiritual development and sanctification, as well as accountability. So, rather than avoiding the opposite gender, lean into the richness of wholesome community relationships, especially within small groups. Acknowledge the value of such interactions and let them serve as a model for your conduct.

Don’t Compare

The journey to purity is personal and unique for each believer. Comparing our progress with others can lead to discouragement or false pride. Paul warns against such comparisons, reminding us that our ultimate standard and example is Christ Himself (Gal. 6:4-10). As we fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith (Heb. 12:2), we find the model of purity and the means to achieve it through His empowering grace. Comparing yourself to others is of no benefit. Don’t do it.

“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin!”

Psalm 51:1–2

In closing, you may have been knocked down, but don’t stay down. Get back up. Acknowledge your failure and pursue Christ. He will accomplish it in your life. You can have a reputation of purity again.

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