Love Your Wife by Leading Her

Scriptures: Ephesians 5:25; 1 John 3:16; John 15:13

Valentine’s Day is on the horizon. This means husbands everywhere are scrambling to figure out how they can express their love to their wives in a way that will last for the next 365 days.

The Bible has a better plan. It involves an expression of love each day, not just one. And get this—it doesn’t involve roses, chocolate, or dinner. It does, however, involve a kind of sacrifice modeled in our Lord Jesus.

In Ephesians 5:25, husbands are commanded, “love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This comes on the hems of instruction to Christians on mutual submission (Eph. 5:21). This means the love we show our wives will be dipped in a river of meekness, tenderness, care, and service—not chocolate. It’s a kind of love that is humble and sacrificial.

The sacrifice Jesus made for the church epitomizes the love we should have for our wives. In 1 John 3:16, we read, “By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us.” Jesus taught this clearly from John 15:13, “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.”

Loving your wife is a sacrifice—of your time, your hobbies, your plans, your friends, and more—for the sake of leading her closer to Jesus. It’s a love that sees everything in light of one thing—sanctifying her for the Lord.

Ephesians 5:23 codifies the husband’s leadership of his wife by saying, “the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church.” It’s not a one-day or even one-time event of romance. It cannot be epitomized in roses or jewels. It’s an ongoing devotion to presenting your wife to God as a godly woman who knows the affections of Christ because of the affection of her husband.

It happens moment by moment.

The best way to love your wife is by leading her toward Jesus in a way that makes His love the greatest love she will ever know. Husbands, when Valentine’s Day ends, your love shouldn’t.

In the days to come, we’ll explore how to express biblical love in the way we lead our wives into godliness and by being the husbands we’re commanded to be.